Sometimes we may find ourselves questioning our strengths or constantly self-evaluating after we have completed a project at work or completed a task that requires our expertise. I remember becoming quite paranoid at one point earlier in my HR career with self-evaluation. I found myself (even though I was a meditator) not having a secure sense of self. However, when I was present and honest with myself which usually happened during moments of reflection after meditation, my mindset was going through these constant fluctuations of feeling bad and inadequate to feeling stressed and frustrated with trying to feel good about myself. When I started to step back and took a sabbatical in my 20s to spend a great deal of time in solitude I soon realized that this was often a situation all human beings universally at some point feel. These moments of suffering. We learn from our ancestral biology that these feelings happen to us to a certain degree because we are social mammals. Us being human beings has a lot to do with hierarchies when it comes to survival in our early history. When we think of how natural selection works from a scientific point of view, it was our ancestors who had a certain element of distrust and lack of self-esteem which helped them find resources to survive. So these thoughts of : “ Am I doing okay or not?” are implicit from our ancestral biology point of view due for survival.
So how do we evolve from this mindset? The answer comes in neuroplasticity. We have learned from neuroscience over the last 20 years that the brain is malleable and can be re-wired with mindfulness and compassion! The good news is, that this is a universal problem and this is not a sign of our personal failure.
I find in my experience, mindfulness curiosity enables a spaciousness to manage these thoughts in the moment at work. Each time we get caught in these self-evaluative thoughts at work, the first step is just using mindfulness to pay attention and notice how your mindset shifts. Then journal about these thoughts “ Why am I feeling these thoughts?” or “ Is this the real truth or the story I am telling myself?”
One of the things I like to explore with my coaching clients is looking at all the different realms that generate this perspective. So I invite you to think about the different realms you are participating in. What is your social media involvement like? What are you reading? What are you watching? Start by observing your actions and interactions and keep on doing this for a while whilst always keeping a mindful focus on your breath and/ or body in the moment. Most importantly, be curious and always notice how you are feeling in your body during these moments.
5 min Breathing Meditatation for Anxiety .m4a
Curious to learn more? Please consider checking out our free guided meditation resources @janujoyfulservices or book a free consultation where we operate on all time zones to offer connection and healing. We offer you the space to investigate your fear, suffering and pain. Looking for professional support ? Please check out our next virtual transformative emotional intelligence and mindfulness programs… @inseusmindfulness where you will also find some free resources to develop your self awareness!